Thursday & Friday

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Thurs – nice lie in.
The full monty breakfast cooked by the two of us at 907
Eggs, Bacon, Beans & Toast AND real coffee.
Made it over to Twin Peaks (Kingsbridge)
Went to SML – needed to catch up with a few work things…
Up to Solicitors to pay for new Land Registry search on #11
Off to Batson for Tea at 4pm Py’s diary reads like this :

it’s april 20th and i have nothing to celebrate it with. piss.
you don’t even want to know what i’ve done yesterday or for the past few days. i offered my soul to the devil incarnate – okay, well i went to a peace treaty w/camp.cross since norwich is constantly getting dumped on for the malice it has caused. we all came to meet in symbolic reference that we all wronged in some way, as equal quarters of the whole. margaret had the right idea, but there is only so much i can tolerate, and in fact, i never said that i would never see them if they decided to patch things up.

things will never be ‘patched up’ though. we know this, so don’t wig out. we just drew a line.

it was still evident that janet didn’t really want to be there, and she still had to do the incredibly stupid trivia-thing. this woman can only speak about dogs, brands of food and other products, and coronation street. no, i’m really serious. she couldn’t stand the fact that mx and i had a great holiday in cornwall so she had to say something in order to dampen it in some way.

oh land’s end isn’t anything to see

oh of course you got a pizza for only £6.95 in st. just–what do you expect of the poorest county in all of britain

oh i’ve only been there once but rah rah rah…
ugh. stupid cow. then when we kept ignoring her winging, she had to go show off her new handcreme to margaret. margaret was busy getting the tea out for fuck’s sake, the last thing she wants to hear is janet telling her how great her new hand goo is. i don’t think she paid attention to a damn thing in the real conversation. instead, she watched how margaret cut the buns or served the tea. when we came to the details of some house in salcombe though, she was able to rattle off all the owners and previous owners and family history of the owners and …. oi. i really detest her. i only did this for mx though. i think when meesh and roz read this they’re going to cruxify me. no, i hope it doesn’t seem like i’ve given in, but at complete stalemate we weren’t going to get anywhere, and they were just going to continue to give mx more grief and such.

i can’t believe i’m going home in less than two months though. i’m afraid of the changes. i just keep hearing worse and worse things everytime i call someone in chicago. i’m afraid of getting lost somewhere i’ve walked thousands of times before. it’s going to be a huge shock of course, and living back w/the.maternal.unit isn’t sounding very pleasant. maybe i can rent a room off of uncle.d or something. that way i’ll be a bit more free and closer to

i’m way too good at playing the game of procrastination. vah. back to the books.

ambling rambling back and forth
do i really know where i’m going
back again
back again
lost somewhere between here and now
confusion sets in
i cannot see anything familiar
lost in my own space
looking for that familiar face
any sign of confirmation
that i know where i am
that i know what i am doing
other people seem to be able to pick things apart more clearly than i can
it upsets me
i’m supposed to be in control
i’m supposed to know the way
and yet i feel i don’t
that pie has been long forgotten
the whole is lost
the good is gone
and i mourn it’s loss.

Supper – Py made a wonder meal as usual – Turkey & Black peppers, I helped with the spuds.
Back to camp cross.

10 Trip to Kingswear to see an SML client
1.30 give film from hols to D&P shop
Back at SML
3-5.30 work
Potter at work
7 home – supper
8-9:15 strimmed back bank – gave up got dark
-> On phone
11 Online
11:30 Need to catch up with Py

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